12.30.2004

oh bunkers

i am so very tired and my shoulders ache. i worked from 2:30 to 11:00 which seemed like an eternity. in the last ten minutes i cut my thumb and bumped my head all at once. i do that when i'm tired. monster does too- you can tell when he is exhausted because he'll start to randomly walk into walls. it is actually kind of funny. speakin of monster, earlier he told me he wasn't going to have a birthday party next year because he wants to stay five and if he doesn't go, he won't turn six. i had to agree that i would love it if he stayed five but unfortunately, time marches on and he'll be six next september either way. to that he replied "oh bunkers!" (bunkers is his new exclamation for everything. it is his five year old way of saying "oh fuck!". isn't that cute?)

12.29.2004

Graffiti


graffiti
Originally uploaded by Kimba

Ah, yes.. back in beautiful Missouri. This was taken out the car window on the way back from the airport. Today, by the way, is way warmer than it was EVER in Florida during our visit. Go figure.


12.28.2004

animal noises

monster likes the horse (back end of course)

12.27.2004

thank god we're done

twas the monday after christmas
and all through the house
monster watched cartoons about a mouse

gnu played final fantasy without a care
as kimba watched vh1 and refused to go anywhere

12.26.2004

power hammer

so we are back in missouri. the boys are downstairs comparing their tools. literally. gnu got a tool belt with knee pads. Master Toad [the greatest web guru in tha world, with eyes like a hawk, and a mind like clean, iced-down bong water >;-)] got a power drill for his um... job.
downstairs, gnu is telling toad:
"If you wanna make miters on four corners..."
"If I'm measuring out to no man's land, I'll measure from the edge."
"Do you see the difference in striking power?"
"It's the hammer from the future!"

12.25.2004

Bearing gifts, we travel afar!

Merry Official Christmas. Today, we woke up in Vero Beach, Florida and opened gifts with Beach Bum. Then, we hit St. Helen's Catholic Church to celebrate the birth of Jeebus and guess what? I didn't burst into flames when I dipped my hand in the holy water. After that, to the beach! Monster jumped in with all of his clothes on (water wasn't that cold, air was about sixty degrees) and gleefully celebrated Christmas away from the bite-ass cold. Next up, nap time. Good tidings to you, to you and to yours.

Christmas OCD


Christmas OCD
Originally uploaded by 704d.

So, Mike's Grandma Peggy says we are going to see some Christmas Lights. Little did I know we were about to witness the most INSANE CHRISTMAS LIGHT DISPLAY EVER. The couple that own this house don't even live in it- they live across the street. That's right, they bought the house across the street just to decorate it for Christmas. In December, they have an open house and show off the inside as well. It has just as many decorations in there as it does outside. The couple that does not accept money nor sponsors. How is that for a refreshing alternative to capitalistic greed? They do it because they love Christmas and want to share their collection. Wow. The man dresses up like a very convincing Santa and greets every kid with a laugh or a hug. The woman gives everyone a candy cane. Maybe they are the real Mr. and Mrs. Claus...

12.23.2004

yo

yo. i'm in florida. ornaments on palm trees, kids skating in shorts, short sleeves and flip flops. why don't i live here fulltime? it is 15 degrees at home and around 70 degrees here. nice.
we are on a whirlwind adventure of family visits. we are about to leave one and go to another to surprise gnu's mom. tomorrow, monster and i are heading to the beach, bitch! we're going to build a snowman out of sand- making it a sandman. i'll send a pic. peace out.

12.17.2004

Baa Ram Ewe


baa

This sheep wants you to have fun this Holiday. Actually, I don't know what the sheep wants, it probably just wants to avoid being eaten. Monster and I visited the Lincoln Log Cabin Historic Site last weekend. As we turned the corner, we saw historical reinactors butchering a giant, hairy pig and a racoon. Monster accidently stepped in some entrails that were under the hanging carcass. He screeched "Get it off me!" and then asked the guy dressed like it was 1845 why he killed the pig. The man explained it was for meat and Monster told him "Well, I'll never eat a dead pig." The reinactor looked at me like "Hey, haven't you explained to your kid where meat comes from?" and I have to admit I hadn't.

It is so much easier to imagine it just comes prepackaged in styrofoam and saran wrap and that is the way it always was. I can't explain to him that we're eating those animals we saw at the pettting zoo and the cartoon pig in Dora the Explorer is different than real pigs. The real ones don't count in spanish and climb trees to eat apples. Though that would be somethin. The real ones live in corporate farm factories, stuffed with food and antibiotics and slaughtered so we can make bacon on Sundays. I never could have that conversation but now I don't have to- The Lincolns did it for me.

While we were there, I learned that Abraham Lincoln's mother died of milk sickness. Apparently, on top of worrying about dying of scarlet fever and small pox, settlers had to wonder if the milk they drank would kill them. Grazing cows would eat white snakeroot plant (Great name, snakeroot. Such an appropriately vicious name for a deadly root) and didn't die. The cattle would live to give milk that would kill its drinker. There used to be entire epidemics of milk sickness where people would be fine one day and dead the next.

I wonder if people were nicer to each other when death was more familiar and you never knew when a relative or friend would die. Hell, sometimes they didn't even name their kids until they were three because babies just didn't live that long. And, as a woman, you were lucky if you lived to see your kids to three years old. Think of all the people you know that have had c-sections due to complications when having a baby. All of those women, and usually their babies, would have died in 1845.

Now, we don't have to worry about milk sickness and most women don't die in child birth. Our meat comes in neat, bloodless packages at the grocery store. We don't live with seventeen of our closest relatives and wouldn't know how to self sustain in our environments. Imagine no possessions, it's easy if you try. Nothing to kill or die for.

How did we come so far in such a relatively short period of time?


Double Chins- Work of Satan.


how to avoid a double chin in photos.

12.16.2004

Eerie


Eery
Originally uploaded by 704d.

Not oficially winter yet but late comes early and the trees are bare.

What: Funky sunset through winter trees with a few holiday lights thrown in.
Where: Fontbonne Campus in Clayton, MO.
When: Last Monday.


12.15.2004

run run run

gotta run or i'll be late again and god knows i can't be late again or the whole wide world of prompt people will explode.


12.13.2004

christmas in charleston

we are back from our weekend of sleep, food and grandparents in eastern illinois. today, monster discovered where meat came from and that people didn't always have electricity when we visited the lincoln log cabin historical site. more on that later. we visited gnu's awesome grandparents who fed us and watched monster so we could sleep. they are angels on earth.
my parents are now in florida and we're going to florida in ten days. i have to write about six million things before my class at 4:30 tomorrow and i really just want to watch tivo'ed csi (oh yeah, toad, dvr/tivo -- i call it tivo even though tivo is a brand name and our's isn't that brand. it's like saying kleenex for tissue--) totally rocks. it is the best thing since dsl. we can entertain ourselves for days without ever leaving the house. in fact, sometimes we entertain ourselves from different parts of the house and never have to deal with human interaction at all. isn't that what technology is all about? but, we lived for three days WITHOUT INTERNET. or my cell phone. or dvd players. life was good.

12.9.2004

You Better Watch Out


santa
Originally uploaded by 704d.

he knows when you are sleeping
he knows when you're awake
he knows when you've been bad
or good...

santa's a fuckin stalker!!

Yeah, I've done that.

Kim is 65% Sketchy



workhome

today is almost over and i still have not done any of my own homework. i just finished a paper for my brother on toni morrison's only short story, recitatif. toni morrison is my favorite author. her writing is so delicate, complex and masterful. i am always amazed by her work and since i had never read this particular story before, i will be thinking about it for days. if you have never read any of her work, go right now and buy song of solomon. yes, it was one of oprah's book club selections but i read it way before she waved her magic literary wand that makes people read. i cringe that it is one of "her books" because i feel it cheapens the work. kind of like when your favorite "indy" band makes it big and suddenly everyone knows them.
anyway, working on the analysis of this story reminded me of how much i enjoyed being an english major. coincidently, i talked to an english professor today at work. she had earned her PhD in english and is now a professor and writer. that is what i always dreamt of doing. however, i am currently going to school for education. am i going the right way? i figured it was more practical to get my teacher's certification and masters in education and i could always go back to studying literature at a later date. but then days like today happen and circumstances seem more than coincidental- i meet a professor who makes me remember that it is possible and i end up reading and writing about a newly discovered story by my favorite author. i remember how easy it is for me to write about literature and how hard it is to care about "leadership as a teacher". hell, i have a really f'in hard time leading my self and my own household. sigh. maybe it will all be obvious again one day. but, i digress, i must force monster to go to bed even though i'm still awake (he hates that), make him stop jumping on the furniture, resist the urge to read many blogs and do some damn homework. tally ho!

p.s.- i spell checked this and it suggested, i shit you not, marijuana's for morrison's and ovary for oprah. that is hilarious.

12.8.2004

smokies foot



When: Spring Break, 1995
Where: Somewhere in The Smokies at this awesome cabin we rented. We stayed there before we hit New Orleans.
Who: My foot. Spring Breakers were Grainbag and The Chef and Evita Pink.

help

i just fucking wrote a long post and the interweb ate it. dammit!!!!!

i have to write a paper on what is learning. do me a favor, send me an email telling me your definition of learning. it can be one word or many sentences. thank you!

12.5.2004

I've been looking so long at these pictures of you...

Heather Powazek Champ is an amazing photographer. I love this collection of mirror pictures. They make me feel better about my many foot pictures that I will post someday. Granted, hers are in mirrors, not of her feet, and they are much better but still.

Lost in Translation made me feel very self-conscious about it for awhile. Charlotte (Scarlett Johansson) tells Bob (Bill Murray. Whom I love. I just watched Groundhog Day last night. Did I mention that I love him?): "I tried taking pictures, but they were so mediocre. I guess every girl goes through a photography phase. You know, horses... taking pictures of your feet."

WTF

Statements I heard tonight at work:

"I shit my pants on our third date, but my wife still ended up marrying me."

"And then, the lady with the giant cold sore sucked the salt off her finger!"

"That guy's car stinks. It smells like used anal lubricant"

12.4.2004

birds in the sky you know how i feel



nightmare
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't there more happy people?

12.3.2004

i am silly

you know, cheese just isn't a very effective breath freshener. trust me, i tried. i was running late for class, having just finished my paper at the last minute (so typical) and realized i had, ahem, stinky breath. i was in a hurry and felt i didn't have time to brush my teeth. so, i ran into the kitchen looking for something to refresh my palate. i decided to grab a piece of American cheese and run. well i got to the car, i realized there was no way cheese was going to cut that acrid taste in my mouth and that i was just silly. maybe if they made mint flavored cheese....
after i got into my car and decided my cheese just wouldn't help, i decided not to eat it. i merely wanted it for breath freshening and wasn't in a cheese mood. brie perhaps, but not a kraft singles mood. just then, evita called. i know it is her before i look at the caller id because her ring is personalized to the rohan theme from lord of the rings. i talked to her for awhile and then reached a stop light where i decided to curl my eyelashes. yes, i do have an eyelash curler on hand in my vehicle. don't you? so, i was on the phone, cheese in my lap, on the phone and curling my eyelashes. i looked over to my left and there was an older gentleman laughing his ass off at me. which is great. i'm sure i looked absurd and he went home and told someone else about it. too bad he couldn't see the kraft single on my leg.


12.2.2004

absorbent and porous and yellow is he

i'll pay you to steal me one...

whatever

you know, when people remind you that you could get more done if you just woke up earlier? yeah, that's just annoying.

loaded with sugar

monster says if you eat too much sugar, you'll get fat like his aunt who has another baby in her belly. he also says ketchup is loaded with sugar but then will ask you "what does loaded with sugar mean?"

12.1.2004

imaginary celebrity boyfriend corrale

i like this site.

who are you? who who who who....

today was a little hard. cold, gray, rainy, busy as hell at work. i burnt the shit out of one of my fingers and almost had to put a snooty biatch in her place. but, i held my shit together and had a pleasant evening nap, the amazing race (best reality show ever. we want the father and daughter to win.) and CSI miami. we watch all three CSI's but can barely stand to watch Miami because of David Caruso's low talking. he speaks in this low, "meaningful" voice all the time like everything he says is so very dire and important. We hate Horatio's low talking and bad puns. We want him to get off'ed in a very creative manner and find out that the rest of the cast did it because they couldn't take his voice.