Overshooting Is Not A Crime!

First, A link to ZeFrank. Here. He is thinking so you don't have to! For those of you who don't know who Ze is he's been doing this internet thing for longer than I, and is much better at it. How's that for an endorsement. WARNING: Do not visit link unless you have hours to waste and no stiches in your sides.

And now to refer to the title of this post. Overshooting is a paintball term referring more or less to how many times you shoot an opponent. Shooting them twice is okay, wheras shooting them more than twice, say 30 times, is considered malicious overshooting. Being shot hurts, and no matter how tough you are getting hurt sucks. Gnu and I went paintballing on my birthday and last sunday, and several times i was the victim of overshooting. I'm not complaining. It's only because I was the last (best?) player on the field and the other team was a little too anxious to get me out and win the game. Once, it was 5 on 1 (me) and I was using a frigging tree as cover for my fat ass and I actually had to put my gun on the ground and stick both my hands up in the air to get them to stop. Funny, yes. But I lost, and that sucked. Later on, so did the welts.

Birthday action, then more on paintball.

I got up nice and early on my birthday (the 6th, for those of you just joining us) and went to pick Gnu up to go play paintball. It was an act of god that he was able to go, and I will be forever thankfull to all involved. We got to the field at about 9:45 or so, and there was practically no one there. we finally started at about 11am, and we played 4 games. Not worth mentioning, but we lost all of them and Gnu had to be home by 1 pm so we only got to play 4 games. It was fun, and a day full of getting the shit shot out of you is good for noobs to cut their teeth on. Makes 'em a little more fearless for the next time, if it doesn't scare them off. So I left Gnu at his homeand went back to shower and change before Strassenfest. It still sucked, but the brats were awesome. We only missed Johan and Christ by about 40 yards I found out last night, but what can you do? Back to Kilgor's after Strassenfest and then some Pho Grand. After that we went and saw Taladega nights, which was great. I slept all the way back to his house and then drove home for a 14 hour nap.

Paintball:week 2

We showed up at about 10:45 this time, and just barely got set up before the games started. Our first game, at the field called "mounds" which consists of a bunch of 5 foot sewer pipes was fun. I shot all my paint and ran out of air providing cover fire as Gnu belly crawled around sniping opponents. We won, but I was unable to play the next game (back-to-back switch sides format) as I was completely out of ammo. 540 paintballs shot, with no kills. Gnu shot about 100 or so. Between the first 2 ganes, he killed 6 people or so. I think I might have killed someone, as I was shooting at him and he walked off, but it could have been someone else.
After that we went into a small incredibly overgrown field that was more like a jungle. We lost game one as Gnu spent the whole match sneaking around (out of bounds, you tard) to the enemies rear end, but they called it as I was being shot 60 times and was the last player to be seen on our side. Gnu finally emerged, and another player on the opposite team asked if it was over.
"Well, he's on our side, "I said. " but he's going the wrong way." Then the ref yelled at everyone about crossing the yellow tape was out of bounds. Then he yelled at these 2 guys for about a minute about putting down their masks while on a playing field. He has to do this all the time and it pisses him off. Finally they realised he was yelling at them and they put their masks down.

Paintball History!

In the beginning, there were siongle shot pump action paintpistols or slingshots. Paintballs were invented as a way to easily mark and identify cattle without the inhumane branding. They were not water soluble, and were intended to be permament. Players played with these simple single shot guns and basic shop-style safety goggles. It was unusual to shoot more than 10 or 12 shots in a day, as these paintballs were expensive and hard to come by.
Today the guns are as sophisticated as your cell phone. They run on battery powered "boards" which are microprocessors that tell the gun how many paintballs to shoot. Full auto, 3 shot burst, or "ramping" modes are standard on most electronic guns. The paintballs are force-fed into the guns with battery powered hoppers or "loaders" and most guns can achieve a rate of over 15 Balls Per Second (BPS.) The speed cap is 300 Feet Per Second, or 200 MPH. There are ways around this, but it is CHEATING. On a normal day, with my 300$ marker I shoot about a case pf paint, or 2,000 paintballs. I have an itchy trigger finger.
Paintballs are dangerous. Our masks cover not only our eyes but our entire face, and several brands have released "full head protection" like a lightweight helmet. If you were to be shot in the eye at 300 FPS with a .68 caliber paint ball A. You would die. Or, B. your eye would be "ruined." Or C. Your eyeball would be sprung from you eye socket not busted, but sort of just dangling there. Incredibly painful, but possibly repairable. These three things are avoidable if you A. Keep your mask on, B. Keep your friggin mask on, or C. It's YOUR EYE, RETARD. KEEP YOUR DAMN MASK ON! The ref puts it on the table like this:
"You can either protect your eyes or I'll do it for you. My way's a lot less fun though, I'll send you home." I didn't say all that to scare anyone, paintballs a lot of fun, and very safe as well if you can follow the se 2 simple rules.
1. Keep your mask on.
2. Keep a barrel plug on your gun when not active so's you don't shoot anyone who's not playing/wearing a mask.

That's it.

Game 4 of the day brought me with still some paint and air and on the other side of the field. the one the "winners" occupied. Me and Gnu had a plan. He'd move up first and I'd cover him. when the ref said start, Gnu was not in front, so I went ahead. I got as close as I could, and then dove behind a bunker as paintballs wizzed by me. I poked my haed up for a head-check, and was struck immediately in the goggle, right where my forehead was.
"OUT!" I yelled, raised my gun, and stood up. I took 2 more in the chest (overshooting) and covered my balls and walked off through the grass, as quickly as I could, while providing dead-man cover for one of my other players to advance. It's not so much cheating as it is risking a volley of paintballs in the body to help my team advance. One of my personal favorite tactics. It's a moral battle. Do I shoot at the guy who is already out to tag the other player behind, or let him advance? I know what I'd do. With Gnu bellycrawling and generally having a better position, we won tha match as their last guy ran out of paint and called himself out. pussy.


Games 5&6 were on the "hyperball" court, the same size as the Mounds, but with smaller, more plentiful bunkers and a "snake" A smake is a set of bunkers that run more or less the length of the field and provide a strategic advantage, assuming you can take and hold the snake.
Gnu got out rather early and I had nothing to do for a while but get showered by paint as apparently I was the "mark" for the game. We were up on bodies till near the end of the game, when I thought there was only 1 guy left. I ran out from behind my bunker, spotted 2 others and proceded to run out of air. Not being a little bitch I ran at the nearest enemy housing bunker hoping that the sound of me shooting paintballs 5 feet might keep him down long enough for me to physically tag him out and forcibly take his gun. It didn't work, and he got me. The ball didn't break, but I knew there were a lot more coming and he knew I knew he knew I was out of air so I raised my hand. NO bonus balls for me, thanks. Frustrated, I ran back to the air tent and thankfully my other 2 team mates put up a fight, and I made it back for
Game 6
I was short on balls, only had about 200 or so. that sounds like a lot but to me that = about 3 min. if I play conservatively. "I rallied the team by stating "Okay guys, we gottta do this fast I'm almost out of paint." As the game started, I got behind a conservative big back bunker, and didn't shoot at all. next thing I know there is some dude crowding me. It's a really bad idea to double upo on a bunker. So I took a step back to survey the left side of the field, instead of just pushing this noob into the open, and proceeded to get lit up by an enemy in the snake. my only solice was that he was out jsut as fast as I could yell "SNAKE SNAKE SNAKE!" We won that game. you'll have to ask Gnu about his awesome story about hiding out in the open in the weeds.

So for they day our "team" was 5-1, and I had only gotten 2 confirmed kills, while Gnu reported 8. We are taking a week off, but hopefully we will return, to fight another day.

Wanna go? Gateway Paintball

AMF